In Every Step

While a cliche at this point, it is true that this modern age of quick fixes and immediate gratification has snuck its mentality into all areas of our life. The abundant access to resources and information is a huge blessing when used right, but the expectation of quick results can soon color every interaction. And this is not usually how it works when it comes to the important stuff.

Nature takes its time. In all things, God has a plan more beautiful and intelligent than any timeline we contrive. Just as the growth of a child or a tree escapes our eyes in real time, this is often the case in our journey to God. He has shown me this time and time again throughout this mission year, in my own life but especially in my walk with the friends I have made while missioning on the streets.

The suffering did not begin the first day of their homelessness - this is the case for every single person I have met on mission. Years and years of overwhelming, unthinkable abuse led to the situation they are in for most. Over and over again they were told verbally and non-verbally that their dignity, safety, and desires did not matter. A desperate lack of love. They didn’t end up homeless and addicted overnight, and although we wholeheartedly wish for it, the healing won’t happen overnight either.

Yes, our whole reason for going out to the streets is for the people we meet to encounter Christ. Jesus is the only remedy. But for a few reasons we don’t always proclaim the gospel outright. As we learn from St. Teresa Benedicta of the Cross, we try to take off our shoes before entering one’s soul. We get to know them in their timing, continue to show up and testify to Jesus through our actions, and speak about God as each person is ready.

As the relationship progresses and deepens, trust builds and doors open for us to speak about God more directly. A few times, this has looked like a friend asking, “So why do you guys come out here?”

Sister Teresa also reminds us that God rejoices in every step closer to him we take. He doesn’t wait until the moment we are baptized or completely healed. In most cases, we don’t witness dramatic, immediate conversions. But if we pay close attention, we can often see in little ways that God is doing something in their heart.

Upon first meeting Jake, he declined to pray, on another visit told us what we can pray for later, began to let us pray for him, started to jump in during prayer, and most recently has initiated prayer himself. God has been present in every moment.

Some friends express a desire to come to Mass - sometimes they show up. Even the thought in the midst of the dark place they are in gives glory to God.

Even in these little ways, with every decision to follow one's conscience, every little act of love, every prayer God celebrates for our friends out there and draws them closer. Healing takes time, and God knows that. He is patient, we are not. On the back of the cards we hand out inviting people to our lunch in the park is the image of the Divine Mercy with the words “Jesus I trust in you.” I find myself saying the name of the friends on the street followed by these words.

Especially when I have trouble seeing where he is in their lives. Especially when I am at a loss of words and ideas for them. Especially when I see the enemy attacking harder as they try to take steps in the right direction. Jesus’ love is stronger. He is at work in the heart of our friends on the street and everyone we know.

Lobo - Jesus, I trust in you.
Nick - Jesus, I trust in you.
Erin - Jesus, I trust in you.
Ashley - Jesus, I trust in you.
Steve-o - Jesus, I trust in you.

For everyone living on the streets of Portland - Jesus, I trust in you.