Poor in Spirit

I was aware of what being spiritually poor meant, but I had never really experienced it, not until a couple weeks ago while serving at one of the Mercy Nights. It was dark, cold and raining. The zone I was assigned to seemed to be empty of friends.

We walked a couple blocks before turning the corner and finding three people standing underneath a small covering. Every encounter is unpredictable, but when we offered them soup, they accepted. They were immediately very expressive in their gratitude. I could tell they were humbled, so took this as an opportunity to spend extra time with them. I introduced myself and the group I was with and they told us their names in return. Travis, Christina and Shantay.

They quickly opened up about the struggles of living outside. All at once, all three of them started recounting the worst they’ve experienced, their voices seeming to echo each other. “People drive by and shoot paint balls at us. People walk by and look at us as if we were the ugliest thing they’d ever seen. I’ve been abused/raped multiple times. People assume I will prostitute myself for money just because I’m homeless. People try to run us over with their cars. We get spit at. No one believes us. I’ve been stabbed. We get discriminated against in grocery stores based off of how we look. I’ve been disowned by my family members. We get yelled slurs and names. The little that we have gets stolen…”

They said so much more, but I immediately felt my heart rate increase, a knot swell up in my throat, and a sense of helplessness come over me. As they were still listing off all the evil they’ve experienced, I asked the Lord what to do and there was nothing else but to pray at that moment. “You did not deserve any of this,” I said. “I’m never be able to fully understand your suffering, but I know our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ can. Can we pray together?”

“Yes,” they responded.

I have never prayed with such desperation and conviction before in my life, and I truly felt that Jesus came stood in the midst of our circle. When I finished the prayer and opened my eyes, I saw that Travis, Christina and Shantay were all moved to tears. They said, “If Jesus was walking this earth today, He’d be out here with us.”

~Monika Gonzalez